The stock of suitable and available chief executive candidates for the recently vacated CEO job at the Kangaroos is fast diminishing as The Boxer’s very own ‘Boxer’ announced today that he had officially withdrawn from the interview process.

Boxer very kindly agreed to join us at The Boxer headquarters today to enlighten Boxer as to the reasons for his abrupt turnaround.

Boxer: “Boxy thanks very much for joining us today”

Boxer: “You’re most welcome Boxer. I should declare I’m a big fan of your informative blog and could not think of a finer forum to give this exclusive to.”

Boxer: “Thanks Box, now you attended the first interview today down at Arden Street. So obviously you were more than interested. Why the change of heart?”

Boxer: “Yes that’s correct Boxer. James Brayshaw approached me before Eugene Arocca’s seat was cold, right after he marched him out to the street. To his credit James had done his homework and he knew that I was the one he needed and wanted. I also thought that it was a bit of a change and challenge that I was presently ready for.”

Boxer: “So what happened?”

Boxer: “Well I became concerned when I first walked into the interview. Brayshaw was the only one there. I asked him: James is there anyone else joining us? He said: No why would anyone else join us. I call the shots around here. If you’re not comfortable with that then perhaps we should finish the interview now.

Boxer Boy, I’m telling you the guy is a megalomaniac. He just has this aloofness about him. He incessantly asks himself rhetorical questions, refers to himself in the third person and narrates his thoughts out loud.”

Boxer: “That is a concern Boxer.”

Boxer: “My thoughts exactly Boxer. I think he’s a bit mad. I also think he is obsessed with Eddie McGuire. I suspect he sees himself as the next Eddie. You know; media profile, no business acumen, bla, bla, bla. The problem is Eddie’s got a bit of a clue about how to run a football club. Brayshaw has no idea.

Bottom line is this bloke is a dictator. Halfway through the interview he starts quoting me from Niccolò Machiavelli’s The Prince. He genuinely believes that he has a tyrannical imperative to retain power at the Club and that to do so he must carefully maintain the socio-political norms within the Club and he thinks that can be achieved in the face of blatant moral corruption.

Poor Eugene never had a chance.”

Boxer: “So what did you say to him?”

Boxer: “Well I was a bit a taken back. He had this crazed look in his eye so I just agreed with everything he said and tried not to upset him. I tried to reign in his rant by asking him about the job. I said: Will I be required to attend all matches?

To which he replied: Pal that’s up to you. I don’t bother. I’ve got better things to do with my important time. I’m a big media star and my public need me more than the players. That’s why we employ Scotty. He’s the coach. He can deal with the insignificance of match day.

Then he went on to tell me a little more about the job. He said: Your job is simple mate. Your represent the club on television when we cop a flogging or have a bad news story to report and I hog the limelight when we have a win or there’s something else fantastic to talk about. I don’t know anything about running a business so all of those matters are yours. Just don’t bugger it up. Nah mate the way it works around here is I listen to one person and one person only, my brother Mark. And he’s usually wrong so I ignore what he says and make my own decisions.

He continued: Look I’m not an educated man. I don’t believe in it. I know Eddie has that journalism certificate from Broady TAFE or whatever, but what good has that done him? I’m a big time media personality without that formal training rubbish and I run a better Club. You watch this space mate. I’m going places and this Club is coming along for the ride”

Boxer: “It sounds like he’s a bit up himself, like he loves himself a little?”

Boxer: “That’s exactly what I thought Boxer you beautiful man.”

Boxer: “So how did it end? What did you tell him?”

Boxer: ” I told him I had some lamingtons in a Tupperware container in my car outside. I said my missus had made them specially and that he might fancy one. I was right; he started salivating and excused me while I went to fetch them. Obviously I had no intention of going back there so I quickly jumped into the driver’s seat and high tailed it.”

Boxer: “Scary stuff Box. So what do you reckon? Who’ll get the job now?”

Boxer: ”I’ve heard a couple of names. Jason Akermanis I know has nothing else on at the moment and takes directions well, but I kind of think that if this Travis Cloke contract negotiation falls through at Collingwood, there might be a father and son package heading to Arden Street. The Club would certainly have no problems given Travis a 5 year contract. They have a proud record of continuing to play old codgers well beyond their use-by dates, just look at Boomer for example.”

Boxer: “Thanks Box.”

Boxer: “My pleasure Box. Come on give us a kiss.”